“You Can’t Turn A Hoodlum Into A Husband”

ok….guys…let’s talk seriously. *I sigh*….this is a serious matter we are about to address. It actually pains me to do what I feel like I have no choice but to do. I’m lying. I’m about to dig in or as the lovely “Asia Star (Philadelphia Vlogger personality)” would say “crevis in between….that a**”

I have seen this too many times and I fall victim to it from time to time as well. We settle. Settle for people who are either not on our level…on society’s level…on A level at all. It happens every day men and women are bamboozled by the perfect traits of a FAR..FAR from perfect boo. I see men oogling at women who are to say the least, the tackiest of tacky, the pastiest of paste and need I say it, very bad miniscule representations of a lady. Yes, I know it seems harsh but I’m sure we’ve all seen that person who makes you go really? him/her?

It never fails, I can only talk from the female perspective but I am caught with the Scooby Doo face constantly when I see the creed of women, some guys go for. I wonder what is it about those women…then I remember..Confidence but that’s neither here nor there. Men so often want a “so-so woman” with a big booty, long hair, and no self respect I get it; versus a good woman with an average body, amazing intellect and a high self-esteem. It makes sense.

Women (specifically teenage girls, I’m coming at you to). I see you (raises eyebrow). Getting smiley faced and giggly around the 24-year-old drug dealer in front of your corner store, fancying on young men who have ABSOLUTELY nothing going for themselves. You do not have to settle for such. There are plenty amazing, smart, motivated young men who are willing to treat you as the beautiful woman you are, not the cute “shawty” from up the street.

Yet in still, this people CAPTIVATE US. We are always! always! thinking we can change someone. That our love will save them from the heinous things they involve THEMSELVES in and then will be our end all be all. We accept the things they put us through and we end up thinking that just because “we’ve been through so much” that is a sign that we’re meant to be. That couldn’t be anymore untrue. WE PUT UP with so much because we THINK it’s meant to be, not because God said stay with this person its meant to be. Nope…he didn’t…we said it. We can not change anyone who does not want to change, and it is immensely hard trying to convince someone otherwise. All you can do is hope that they see things for themselves and let them go about their way. According to Aristotle, if it pains a person to be virtuous (good) then they are not, in fact they are evil. If it pains them to be the person you need them to be, then in fact they are the polar opposite and may never be that person for you…. And that’s okay.

I digress, into saying we have all experienced this. Whether we’re the young girl with the drug dealing boyfriend, the man oogling someone we know ain’t right, or the woman who is selling herself short with the man or men she associates with.

You are worth so much more than you settle for…change that!

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One thought on ““You Can’t Turn A Hoodlum Into A Husband”

  1. I will say the possiblity is there but it comes down to values of ther guy. If the guy grew up in the hood and hasn’t expose to ideas or warm to ideas outside then is going to very hard for women to have a proper husband. I am confident they are a few case it has worked out. But the end of the day it comes down to values n ideas to the guy has;and his willnes to commit to the women forever. If the guy is ready to commit it can happen other than that is no happening.

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